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Words to Inspire When Life Happens by Care'n Mooney

Care'n Mooney
Comfort, being present for someone

In the amazing experiment called life we are given many opportunities to experience a vast array of emotions and feelings. As members of the human race, we seem to learn more by being in the action, in the heart of it, in the heat of life.

 

We need to feel and experience, not just read or hear about it. Doing and feeling it, the pros and cons of the decisions, help us bring about a long-lasting memory that can serve as experience.

 

One of the greatest lessons is to learn what we need to learn and then release it. 

 

With the triumphs in life, we are also given our fair share of trials and tribulations. When we are facing the hard stuff: loss, divorce, betrayal, terminal illness, death, what do we need to get us to the other side? What do we need our friends and family to say to us that will uplift us?

 

What words can be used at this time? We have been taught the proper response and phrases that others thought would uplift. If someone were to say these words to us in our time of need, what would they really sound like? Words with empathy are feeling.

 

For instance, when the door shuts, a window always opens, "It's for the best" is offered, or "they are in a better place." "I know how you feel" are meaningless. These words of sympathy, which by definition is pity or sorrow, are commonly used when dealing with something we would rather avoid. A way to shield ourselves from the reality that these things can happen to anyone.

 

When we find words filled with empathy, we are able to express concern rather than worry.

 

Let's take the expression "when the door shuts." In reality, this is true for people who are able to see possibilities; however, to the average person, it is meaningless. Someone who knows how to love themselves can see that the impossible can be possible.

 

When we are at our darkest hour, it is a lot harder to be in that mindset. "They are in a better place." I personally have seen the other side, and this is true. Again, when you are faced with the emotions of loss and the gamut of emotions that you are experiencing, these words can also be meaningless.

 

How about substituting "I know they will be missed," "I know this is very hard for you," "what do you need from me"?

 

Someone is terminal, making the transition. What do you say? Telling them they will be missed is not really comforting; however, perhaps reminding them of all the amazing things that they have shared with you and how you have grown from them.

 

Let them know their value. Don't wait until the funeral to tell the world about them; tell them now. Write them a letter of appreciation.

 

I had a client who was in hospice and was being told every day how close he was to leaving. He told me he had other things to do and asked me to assist him with weekly Reiki and energy sessions. He went a year past his death date and accomplished all he wanted to do.

 

What about a job loss? The big response might be that you were too good for them. To take response and change it to "might be, now you can focus on what you really want."

 

These are some words that you may want to share with people in your own verbiage that they may help. 

 

I am here for you

That really sounds challenging

What do you need me to do right now

I hear you I am listening

You matter

They are your feelings to feel

I care about you

You are safe to express yourself

It's okay not to feel okay

You are not alone I am here

You are loved

You are valued

 

Listen to what you are about to say, feel what emotion it really invokes, then find the words you would like to hear, something that would benefit you in a time of need.

 

Being conscious of what you are saying is an incredible gift to give in full.


I see you, I appreciate you, I honor you

© Care’n Mooney

Cosmic Guardians Care'n Mooney









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